he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
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if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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