so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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