I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize
