my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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