How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Randomize