we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Randomize
