guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Randomize
