Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
