could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
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