pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
