he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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