i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Randomize
