yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
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