last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Randomize
