How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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