I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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