We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
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