Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
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