you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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