She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Randomize
