Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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