His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
