Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize