Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
