Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
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