wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize