My Higher Power is John Stamos
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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