And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize