I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
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