Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
