don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
