Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
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