I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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