tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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