i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
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