Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Randomize
