New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
