TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I need a burrito and a hug.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
