You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Randomize
