I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
