Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
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