so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
