my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize