i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
