i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Randomize
