i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
