No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Randomize