everyone is single if you try hard enough
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
