There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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