Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
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