Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize